Photo Credit: Fetish & Fantasy Halloween BallWhy do we get so excited to celebrate Halloween? Maybe we just really like looking like a giant taco.

I can’t help but wonder if we hate our version of reality so much we have to assume a new desired identity, and then throw a party to celebrate our confusion together. See last year for Halloween I dressed up as a cat because I’d rather have 9 lives to this huge mansion party my friend Heidi found on Facebook. Heidi dressed up as a gangster because, well, it’s Heidi and you expect these sorta stunts from her. But, Heidi plus random Facebook party equals a terrible most memorable night. The party was extravagant to a certain extent if you count the two pools, golf course, guest house,12 rooms, some guys’ gushed forehead I mistook for exceptional prosthetic application, and the four police cars that followed. But, nothing compares to these truly extravagant ways to celebrate Halloween in Las Vegas.

1. HYDE BELLAGIO

A post shared by Hyde Bellagio (@hydebellagio) on Oct 13, 2017 at 6:48pm PDT

Okay, this is wild and completely doing the most, and you definitely want to be here. You’re not just drinking and dancing on this day; you also get a show. Word on the street is that Hyde Bellagio is going to have contortionist and stilt walkers at their venue. Their “Freakshow Halloween” celebration starts at 10:30 p.m. on Tuesday, Oct. 31. But am I invited is what I want to know?

2. JEWEL NIGHTCLUB AT ARIA RESORT AND CASINO

A post shared by JEWEL Nightclub (@jewelnightclub) on Oct 16, 2017 at 11:43am PDT

Everyone’s in between hosting or attending a Halloween party, but maybe you should consider skipping them all together and hitting up a nightclub because money. On Monday, Oct. 30, JEWEL is giving $20,000 to the person with the best costume. The event is “It” inspired, you know Pennywise the clown style, and Steve Aoki will be DJing.

3. AMERICANA BOOOOZE & BRUNCH

A post shared by AmericanaLV (@americanalv) on Oct 1, 2017 at 11:05am PDT

There’s an unlimited food brunch for $42 at Americana and you need to go. They’ll be serving French toast with berry compote, shrimp and grits dish in brandy, meatball crostini with fresh mozzarella and basil, and carne asada fries. My mouth watered. Add $17 for bottomless mimosas or bloody Mary’s. Wear a costume if you’re over 21 and you’ll get their  “Caramel Apple Martini” for free. PLUS, the first 50 people will get a pumpkin. Sunday, Oct. 29 from 11 a.m-3 p.m.

4. FETISH HALLOWEEN BALL You can wear Saran Wrap? I say that suggestively because it’s listed in their “dress code” section for appropriate attire. The Fetish & Fantasy Halloween Ball is exactly what it sounds like. Over the past 22 years, many media outlets have dubbed it the sexiest and most risqué party of the year. Hosted at Red Rock Casino, Resort, and Spa on Saturday, Oct. 28.

5. THE BANK NIGHTCLUB AT BELLAGIO RESORT & CASINO

A post shared by The Bank Nightclub (@thebanklv) on Sep 23, 2017 at 7:11pm PDT

Where do ghost get their zodiac information from? They read their “horrorscopes.” That’s all cheesy Halloween jokes I have folks! But can you imagine winning $10,000 for a costume? That’s how much The Bank is offering to the winner with the sexiest costume on Saturday, Oct. 28.

If anyone thinks I have a shot at winning the sexiest costume contest as an avocado with the right kind of fat in the right places *wink*, lemme know.

Or, a taco. I’d also really like to dress up as a taco.

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