Whether you’re a yoga guru, a self-help speed-reader, or a talk-therapy devotee, we’ve all reached for a pint of Häagen-Dazs in moments of sheer desperation. Maybe it’s the sugar, the “forbidden” carbohydrates, or simply the act of treating ourselves to something so indulgent—”screw you, Weight Watchers”—somehow, it elevates our mood and makes whatever we’re crying about seem not so terrible anymore.
Granted, there are some real-world life problems that no amount of saturated fat will fix, but for the small stuff, the self-imposed stressors that plague us each and every day… comfort food, well, it’s comforting. But it’s also caloric, so choose wisely! That day-old cheese danish from the bodega? Skip it. That greasy slice of pepperoni pizza that costs a buck? Next.
If you’re going to eat your feelings, then really, really enjoy eating them. Use your hands. Get barbecue sauce on your face. Slather butter on everything. You’re not there to make friends. You’re there to feel better. So without further adieu, Haute Living presents the best places to eat your feelings in NYC.
144 2nd Avenue
New York, NY 10003
There’s a reason this city never sleeps. We’re all too stressed and strung out on SSRIs. For those times when panic sets in at 3 AM, head to this all-night Ukrainian eatery for a plate handmade pierogi. Though boiled or fried dumplings may not seem like typical comfort food, trust us, after one bite of gooey cheese smothered in sautéed onions and sour cream, you’ll feel otherwise.
222 Montrose Avenue
Brooklyn, NY 11206
As humans, we’re biologically hardwired to “fight or flight” when faced with a perceived harmful event, attack, or threat to our survival. Well, anyone who has experienced the ups and downs of an on-again/off-again relationship knows the physiological urge can be just as strong. For all those vegan lovers and not fighters roaming the city, there’s Dun-Well Doughnuts. This Brooklyn bakery serves more than 200 rotating flavors, from Strawberry Kiwi to Peach Cobbler, all without animal ingredients.
54 Stone St, New York, NY 10004
Sharing has its time and place. But that time and place is not when you’re about to book a one-way plane ticket to France. For those moments when living in the rat race we call New York City becomes too much to stomach, you need a pizza. And not a pizza that you’ll have to share with anyone else or compromise by ordering only half with jalapeños. You need the whole damn pie. And luckily, at Adrienne’s Pizzabar the 12-inch pies are the perfect size for a party of one. So order with reckless abandon, and take a beat on the other reckless life decisions, like cutting your own bangs.
Sarita’s Macaroni & Cheese
345 E 12th Street
New York, NY 10003
After a breakup, the last thing you want to do is sit on a crowded street corner surrounded by smug couples trading bites of paella. But don’t deprive yourself of brunch even if all your friends are boggled down with partners and children. When you’re hit with that initial “Holy hell, I’m alone at 30” moment of panic, take a deep breath, blast some Taylor Swift (no one understands heartbreak like that girl), and head to this East Village standby for a heaping bowl of mac and cheese.